Half-Life Fans Are Confused About What Gordon’s Sticking In Health Machines
25 years after Half-Life's launch, fans have found a new topic to discuss, and it isn't who the G-Man really is, a hidden Easter Egg that has just been discovered all these years later, or an interesting bit of lore that has been overlooked – it's the health charger, and what exactly Gordon sticks in it to heal. Get your mind in the gutter for this one.
The prompt seems pretty innocuous at first, as composer Andrew Hulshult tweeted, "How do you think Gordon got health from this design?" with a photo of the first aid charger attached. The activation point is a small circle, likely to pull out a syringe or some other medical equipment, but everyone expectedly landed on, "Gordon must shove his massive 'crowbar' into the hole".
Someone even attached a photo of Gordon with his back turned, crotch level with the hole. Yes, by 'crowbar' I meant dick if that wasn't obvious.
Forget shoving your stun stick into every hole that crops up across Black Mesa for a second (does the HEV suit even have a zipper? How does Gordon piss? I'm spiralling), as one person suggested that it was used for silly straws. A fun answer that isn't dick-related – a win.
Just picture it, angry HEV grunts marching down the corridors, gunning down scientists, just to get a little papercut when they trash the place. So, they pop by a station for some first aid to sort out that little nick on their finger, only to whip out a silly straw and start gulping. Then along comes Gordon with a crowbar. A real crowbar this time, not a 'crowbar'.
Or maybe you just lick the hole.
It's not the most sanitary option, since you'll inevitably have several security guards and science personnel using the stations throughout the day, and nobody seems to come by and clean them. But it's certainly an option. Just make sure nobody has gone for the first answer before you get all tongue-happy.
While these answers are pretty fun, let's get boring and practical for a second. DanMak put together a full animation for the fan-made remake Black Mesa's first aid stations four years ago, and Black Mesa modelled its stations on the original Half-Life's, so that awkward hole is still there.
In their interpretation, the HEV suit has a chord that Gordon plugs into the machine to heal themselves, rather than pulling anything out of it or putting any body parts near it. So, he doesn't need a zipper after all, but that still leaves one mystery, how does Gordon piss?
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